Wilbur

OK here's the deal, I have a 3 year old Bassett Hound his name is Wilbur. I love the dog, but I feel so bad, since no one in the entire family ever plays with him, so I decided it was best to find him a great home. We hope to find him a home where he will be happy and well cared for, a family that loves him, and plays with him daily.-ter

Well here is Wilbur's story:

Hello my name is Wilbur, I live in a dog run with another dog named Maxx. Maxx is cool but he is kind of annoying since he is like 12 years old, which is like 180 years old in dog years, thing is, he still thinks he is 2. Maxx acts like a two year old , fetching balls, and barking, what an idiot, but hey the people who own us think it is cute so hey more power to him!

I don't know what the deal is, but the people who live in the house, occasionally come out to see us, Maxx and I. They say hi, and make goofy faces and sounds, we think it is a hoot, the people must smoke ganga or something. We don't care since after all we are dogs, and we love everything! Well except cats, and the occasional bird who shits in our food! Anyway, so I think the people want to find me a new home, they think I might be happier with a new family, I am not sure since I kind of like these folks just fine. I mean after all , they hooked me up with a couch in the dog run. A COUCH, I mean who does that? That is totally cool since I spend the day snoozing on the couch, it is the shit!

They also take real good care of me, they feed me daily, they pet me, and again make those funny faces at me, I love that!

So this past Sunday, well I think it was Sunday since I don't really keep track of the days, you know I am very busy snoozing on the couch. So this past Sunday some people come over to see me, and I am kind of skeered, since the one guy I can tell is not really into Basset Hounds. I can totally understand that since I do slobber allot, and my bark is pretty loud. The guy just looks at me. One of my peeps tells the family, I am a great dog and need some attention, all I need is a good bath and my nails trimmed.I also have valley fever, which really sucks cause I have to get meds, well it sucks for the people, but I actually like it since every night they give me pills in a HOT DAWG. God do I LOVE HAWT DAWGS!!!!!!

The new people decide they like me, well the lady anyway,so they get a leash and take me. They lead me to the car, and then I decide , you know what, I don't really want to go. It is tooooo late they drag me to the car and put me in the back seat with two little girls. The little girls are great , but I really don't like that guy.He just keeps eye balling me! WTF?

The guy drives off, and as he does I have a diabolical idea. You know dogs are simple creatures, but on occasion we have some great ideas. The time I pooped on the pool deck was not one of my better moments, but we try.

So I stand up in the back seat, crouch, the little girls look at me and ask the guy what is the doggie doing? As I crouch, I begin to push. You got it! I push out the biggest, steamiest piece of crap I have ever took! It was a total work of art I tell you. Nice and large! You know what, taking a dump there on the car seat was probably one of the most gratifying moments of my doggy life, I mean who gets to do that? The little girls look at me in horror, I am not sure actually, it was not that big of a deal to me anyway. I was so proud I took a dump, then I started barking at the guy, he only glared and I think he started cussing. The little girls screamed in anguish, and moved as close to the windows of the car that they could get.

What is this? I think I felt the car do a 180. Yep it did, the cars tires squealed , and it seemed we were going back to my peeps house! Wow my diabolical scheme worked like a champ. The lady that actually liked me, took me out of the car and walked me to the door. This house smelled very familiar, yep I was back home. The lady rang the doorbell, and my real little girl answered. She took me in, while the lady explained that the guy said no way could I have a dog that took a dump in the car, geeze what would be next, pooping on the pool deck, yea I will do that again fo sho?

The little girl took me in the house, and out to the backyard, to my dog run, to my wonderful couch, I was back. I was back indeed, heheheh.

The moral of my story, if you don't want to do something, just dump on it!-Wilbur ;}